It Can't Be News if it's Old

Re-post from Facebook

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12 white people die in France and North American media freaks out with half hour segments (every hour) under the "Free Speech" banner. Facebook follows suit.

132 students were killed in Pakistan on Dec. 16. Without formatting on Facebook, that probably didn't sink in. 132 students. An estimated 500-2000 people died in Nigeria Jan. 3. In both cases, North America briefly mentions it. Facebook doesn't flinch. Why would we? We're back to our selfies. Besides, it happens all the time in those countries. It can't be "news" if it's old.

What happened to any of them was wrong, obviously - and go ahead, freak out. It's scary. Just don't post something because everyone is doing it. Don't post like you've always been passionate about the world - you aren't. You're passionate about what the media chooses to focus on. Don't post about people dying, homophobia, and other real topics with the same urgency and as little emotion (hashtagging implies you don't have time to write out a full sentence. ‪#‎notime‬) as a celebrity getting married or what you had for lunch. Most of all, don't forget that 12 people dying isn't the worst thing that happened this year, this month, or even today, probably.

I'm not saying all this from a high horse. I'm the same as the rest of Facebook - I hear about what the media talks about, and I don't go out of my way to seek out the rest. I freak out. And posts like this one happen. But most of the time, I keep it to real, person-to-person conversations - I don't broadcast to the world that I know about Charlie Hebdo.

Away from 'Home'

As I walk in the neighborhoods I grew up in the nostalgia threatens to take over my thoughts. Every bruise, laugh, and hug rushes past my eyes and I welcome the memory as i would an old friend. I realize that no matter how far and wide I run this will still be home. This, where it snows 11 months in a year, where trucks rule the road, and where construction is just as much part of the landscape as the rivervalley.
I continue...
Through the hallways that were once home. Listening to those who had once, and remain my mentors. Those who helped me on my journey to the person I am today, those who shaped the person I will become.
Through the collegiate streets I once adored. Still do. The leaves crunch under my feet, and a smile finally finds its way to my mouth. So many good memories.
100 things to do, coffee dates, rivervalley walks, nearly getting run over by angry bus drivers every morning.
The smile lingers as I remember those who carried me through the most difficult times of my life. Many of whom I owe my life. All of whom each hold a piece of my heart.
The tears begin to fall, slow at first. A long breath.
They say home is where the heart is.

-Teresa Bawa-an

It's odd to read something like this coming from someone who moved away and is back in town for a visit. Whenever I think of the future, I mostly think about what I would be doing, and what life would be like; I've never thought about where I would be. Being in Software Engineering, there's a big chance of having to move to a new city, perhaps even having to move to the U.S.

I have moved away from my birthplace, but I'd say it was quite different. Having a large extended family in the Philippines, I was mostly around them, and barely hung out with my own friends. And moving to Canada was with my [immediate] family. Moving out after University however, would mean leaving home, family, friends, the familiar places, and even the nameless, yet familiar faces I see daily. I find it hard to imagine living without all these people. There's always the phone and the internet, but that's not quite the same as physically being with the people you love.

What "Be Yourself" Really Means

The Traditional Definition

You've probably heard it. You've probably told someone at some point: "be yourself".

Whenever I was told that, I didn't have a clue what it really meant. The more I heard it, the more useless it became. Do what you normally do right? But that's an infinite loop, because you don't know what you normally do. That's why you asked whatever you asked in the first place, but you were simply told to be yourself. Besides, "self" is a complex word. Allison Mack wonderfully explains it (I didn't plan to start reading any celebrity's blog, but this one has some deep posts that captured my attention). You takes on a new definition around every person, and possibly even different when combinations of people are present.

My Definition

Someone on Yahoo Answers asked a question about copying her friend's style and I figured I just had to tell her my thoughts on being herself, because a lot of the answers were "be yourself" with no real explanation. I've had this philosophy for quite a while now, probably since the last few months of Grade 12 but I've never explained it or shared it with anyone. The more I think of my explanation, the more it seems to be the perfect way to share it.

Sounds like a topic that should be left for the women here, but I'll answer anyway.

"Be yourself" doesn't do it justice. Whenever I was told that, it didn't really help me, nor did I really understand what I was supposed to do in order to "be myself".

Here's my take: Do what you want, only if it's because you want to do it. Don't do anything that you think others would want you to do.

Applying it to this, if you're changing your style because *you* really like that style, or *you* think it will make you better, go for it. If it's because you *think* *other people* will think you look better, then you have the wrong reasons.

And to emphasize the first point, do it if you like that particular style. You'll find that you wont really be copying her. You'll just be going for a style you love. If you're only doing it because this girl is popular or whatever and you want to be like her, then don't. That would be copying. You can tell this is the case if you think you "like" her style whenever she changes it.

I don't know if that makes sense. But in a nutshell, do it if YOU want it and you have YOUR OWN reasons. Don't consider what other people might think. And don't copy. It's completely different from adopting a style you like that happens to already be used by someone else.

-2Perfect, Yahoo! Answers

Like I said, this might be hard to make sense out of, but if you really try to understand it, I think it will really be helpful.

Few examples?

If you like a girl, don't change the way you act and look because you think she'll like it. She probably wont. However, if you find a style you really love and you think it fits you, go for it. Indirectly, you're still reaching the same goal: Making yourself better. Only one is in the eyes of others, and you're not even certain if they actually think you're now better. The second is in your own eyes, which you're obviously sure of.

If you're not doing great in school or something, don't improve your marks for your parents. In a good way, parents will never be satisfied until you are perfect. They want their children to be the best they can be. Which means if you go from 50s to 60s, they'll now be looking for 70s. If you go from 80s to 90s, they'll look for 100s. So if you want to improve your marks, do it for yourself. If it would make you feel better, if it would make you feel smarter, more confident in yourself. If it would make you feel more useful, etc. I mean at a young age, if you followed this, you obviously don't care much about what you want past the next couple days, so this wont work. But at high school then University, it's all up to you. Don't do it for your parents. Do it for you.